Q: Our youngest daughter graduated from a drug rehabilitation program two years ago. She was and is recovering from a cocaine addiction. She has done really well since then and has rebuilt a great life for herself and her daughter. We are proud.
But we also have concern. Of late, our daughter has suggested having a drink or two. She says alcohol was not a problem for her when she was using drugs and she thinks she can handle it. That may be so, but her dad and I are still worried. We would rather she left well enough alone. Unfortunately, we do not have the background to argue for or against her proposition for a drink or two every now and then. We could use some guidance.
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A: The simple and only answer for your daughter is NO. The abstention she has successfully followed since breaking her cocaine addiction must be built around whatever temptations she has for alcohol. She should not give in to them.
In many ways your daughter is right, cocaine and alcohol are different. But they have one alarming similarity – both affect dopamine, which is the foundation of most addictions, whether drugs or alcohol.
Our neurological systems all have dopamine that stimulates the feel-good part of the brain. When you build a little bird house and hang it on a tree in the back yard, your brain releases dopamine, which encourages you to say to yourself, “wow, isn’t that great? I feel so good!” Everything is fine. You enjoy the birdhouse.
The problem with addictions is that the addict will seek that same dopamine without building the birdhouse. Addicts want the effect without making the effort. And of course they get it, either by snorting cocaine or having a few too many drinks.
Unfortunately, those feel-good moments are temporary. They must be reinforced, either by taking another drink or running another line of cocaine. Keep it up and the addict relies solely on the addiction for dopamine. Nothing else works.
We all know the final chapter of that story. It is a personal disaster.
Your daughter is right that there are differences between alcohol and cocaine. The biggest is what the brain does with dopamine once it is in the system. If derived from alcohol, it tends to be ingested quickly and has to be replaced almost as soon as it is acquired.
The dopamine derived through cocaine or other drugs is not quickly ingested. It hangs around, building stronger reservoirs of dopamine and driving the victim into destructive and impulsive behaviour. People on drugs are notorious for hurting themselves. They have too much dopamine in their systems.
Your daughter is doing well. You have every right to be proud of her but you need to be cautious. If she continues to suggest experimenting with her program, encourage her to attend a few more Narcotic Anonymous meetings. The people there have been through it and can help her continue the path to complete sobriety.
Jacklin Andrews is a family counsellor from Saskatchewan. Contact: jandrews@producer.com.
