I’ve had several people drop into my office in the past few days to ask if we are really in the midst of a federal election.
If it weren’t for the preponderance of news about Jean ChrŽtien and Stockwell Day in the national press and on the television news, I would have to say no.
Certainly, in rural Saskatchewan where I hang my coat (don’t often wear a hat to hang), all is quiet on the election front.
Last week, the husband and I had occasion to drive to Regina. It was an 800 kilometre trip there and back, and we did some driving around the city and nary an election poster did we see.
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We have yet to see one in our own neck of the woods, and even the post office box has been free of campaign material.
Every time I open the box, I expect to see Day or ChrŽtien staring back, or even Alexa McDonough or Joe Clark.
None have appeared.
Fortunately, to take the boredom out of the non-campaign, we have a local candidate.
Keith Richardson is running for the ESTON Party.
The initials stand for Expect Something Terrific – or Not. This is probably the most honest election slogan you’re likely to hear.
Richardson has worked out a full platform too, which may not appeal to all but is honest and up front: If elected, he will build shipyards at the nearby Lancer Ferry on the South Saskatchewan River. Bombardier will be invited to build an airplane factory here; workers imported from Ontario and Quebec will be paid low and taxed high.
Unlike some parties, Richardson has a definite plan for agriculture: the government will cash rent all farmland for $10,000 a quarter and will pay all taxes on it. Banks will have to pay back all the interest accrued on loans over the time of the loan.
This will take care of retirement income for farmers.
Schools will be torn down, as Richardson does not want some smart kid trying to unseat him in four years.
Since he plans to rule as a dictator, he will be saving the electorate a lot of money because everyone will vote this time and never have to vote again.
Richardson’s platform is tongue-in-cheek, but it’s fun and contains more information than the platforms of the other parties we have yet to see.
If the traditional parties don’t soon pull up their socks, they may find that, in Eston and area, a lot of people will be voting for the hometown candidate whose motto could well be “Put the Fun Back in Politics.”
