Q: Our youngest son, 21, has Down syndrome,and is still living with us at home. Next year, he will be too old to continue getting support from our school board and will likely have to move to a larger community if he is going to get into projects outside of the home. The school has been preparing him for a transfer and social services has assigned a community worker to help us relocate our son.
But both my husband and I are reticent about this change. He is such a gullible kid. We fear people will take advantage of him. What can we do to protect him as much as possible?
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A: Most people with Down syndrome are loving and caring individuals. That makes them vulnerable.
Apart from preparing your son for the larger community, you can do little to protect him. The law is clear. Your son is legally an adult.
Many families in your situation have to shift gears. Instead of working for their children, they have to learn to work with them and respect the learning potential.
Most kids have troubles of one sort or another. Your best bet is to make sure that you and your son have a great working relationship. He needs to feel comfortable turning to you for advice and guidance if and when he gets himself into difficulties. That won’t happen if he senses you are judging and criticizing him. Your son’s odds for success are better if he has some idea of what he wants to do for the next couple of years. You might find it helpful to check in with him three or four times weekly to start building some confidence in him so that he can dream and plan for his future.
One of your biggest problem is that you are going to miss your son. Down syndrome children have a special way of capturing our hearts.
