Last weekend, I attended the 10th anniversary of BridgePoint Centre for Eating Disorders in Milden, Sask.
One of the speakers was Dr. Anita Johnston, director and co-founder of the Anorexia & Bulimia Center of Hawaii.
She has worked with disordered eating for more than 25 years and is touring a workshop that addresses the underlying causes of eating disorders. Johnston’s book, Eating In the Light of the Moon, has been translated into five languages.
She believes that eating disorders are coping strategies to deal with one’s life.
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In her book and in her speech, Johnston explored how myth, metaphor and storytelling can help.
People with eating disorders can perceive subtle realities and hypocrisy, differences that the rest of us ignore, ridicule, reject or deny. As a result, the person with the eating disorder tends to “dim their light” to fit in and not create waves.
It is often a thinner-skinned person who is super sensitive, feels things deeply and has compassion and concern for others. Our society teaches thick-skinned attitudes, such as “suck it up,” “don’t let it bother you” and “quit overreacting.”
Johnston spoke about the need to learn about metaphors to understand and deal with the issues underlying eating disorders. A person cannot change what has happened in his or her life, but is in charge of the reaction or meaning given it.
With eating disorders, addictions, or simply coping with one’s life, storytelling can help make sense and order out of what is happening, making it easier to talk about it.
Johnston talked about a princess who tried to fit the role set out for her, but could not survive in that atmosphere. She tried to cope with her suppressed hurt emotions and the lack of control over her life, and eventually became bulimic.
When she sought counselling and began allowing out her natural compassion and intuition, she earned the nickname the Queen of Hearts.
It was a tale of transformation and healing, as well as a tale of tragedy for Princess Diana.
Johnston also told a story she heard as a child about a luminous bowl of light and life. As a person grows, sometimes dark stones are put into this beautiful bowl. As more stones are put in the bowl, it gets darker. At any time, you can turn that bowl upside down, dump the rocks out, or remove the stones one at a time. It is a choice. What a beautiful metaphor for new beginnings.
Consider feelings
We are aware of our thoughts, but are we listening to our feelings? Johnston encouraged her audience to focus on feelings rather than on what others think. Ask yourself “What feeling do I have? What is
my reaction to that? What is it like for me to be here with these people?”
Listen to your body and your intuition, and try to honour what you are feeling. We create our own path through life, which is a road to recovery, wholeness, self-love and living a life in balance.
Johnston also spoke about learning how to tell the difference between hunger for food and psychological hunger. When you look with curiosity rather than judgment, it is easier to understand what you are really hungering for. What feeling are you trying not to feel?
Another speaker at the conference was Merryl Bear, executive director of the National Eating Disorder Information Centre. She spoke about the importance of parents as part of the solution for girls and boys with eating disorders.
Eating disorders can be about struggle for self-control and emotional regulation. Parents can be beacons of hope who do not give up on their children. She outlined the following advice that families can use to help their loved one with an eating disorder.
- Tell them you love them, unconditionally.
- Be available to listen.
- Be the safe practice ground for expressing feelings and testing out behaviours.
- Learn to explain out loud what you are feeling.
- Show a balance between work and play, spending time at home with family and friends.
- Spend time with self-affirming activities and people.
- See the disorder as not the sole identity of the person, but a coping strategy keeping them alive.
- Put limits on what is acceptable and unacceptable.
- Demonstrate rights, responsibilities and accountability.
- Teach them to ask for help and support and ask what you can do.
- Acknowledge that it takes great courage and perseverance.
Sandy Friedman, an educator, author and counsellor in eating disorder treatment and prevention, also used metaphors in her speech. She compared gardening to life with emotional seasons, composting our garbage, hibernation, hard work, growth, thorns and beauty and nourishing oneself with relationships and activities that feed the soul.
Simple suppers
Jean Pare’s newest book breaks meal planning down into three necessary elements to simplify the dinner-making process: vegetables; starches and proteins. Lately, I have been reading about the importance of eating fish high in omega 3 fatty acids. Mackerel and lake trout are high in omega 3s, but other fish are also a good source of these essential nutrients. This recipe served with a salad makes a great lunch. I used open-faced whole grain bread rather than a French loaf.
Salmon French loaf
2 cans (7.5 oz.) red or 213 g
pink salmon, drained, skin
and bones removed
8 ounces cream 250 g
cheese, softened
1/2 cup roasted red 125 mL
peppers, blotted dry, diced
2 green onions, sliced
1 teaspoon grated 5 mL
lemon zest
1 teaspoon pepper 5 mL
French bread loaf, halved
lengthwise
Combine first six ingredients in large bowl.
Spread salmon mixture on bottom half of loaf. Cover with top half. Secure with six wooden picks evenly spaced apart. Wrap tightly in a sheet of heavy-duty foil. Bake in 375 F (190 C) oven for 20 to 30 minutes until heated through. Cut crosswise between wooden picks into six pieces. Serves six.
Christmas contest
For our annual Christmas draw, we invite you to tell us about any change in how you celebrate the holidays. Is it becoming less complicated? Are you having to share your children with in-laws? Are you spending less on gifts and giving more time? Is your menu preparation simplified?
For your chance to win a prize, send in your story along with
your name and address to: Team Resources, Box 2500, Saskatoon, Sask., S7K 2C4 or contact team@producer.com. Draw will be made Dec. 3.
Barbara Sanderson is a home economist from Rosetown, Sask., and one of four columnists comprising Team Resources. Send correspondence in care of this newspaper, Box 2500, Saskatoon, Sask., S7K 2C4 or contact them at team@producer.com.
