The question “how to harness a 4-H parent’s energy for good, not evil”
drew laughter and woeful recognition at a seminar during a meeting of
the Saskatchewan 4-H Council.
The Oct. 26 seminar offered ideas on how to ensure parents don’t take
over a club meant for their kids.
AnnMarie Nielson Griffin, a 4-H specialist who has two children in 4-H,
said every parent wants the best for their kids. But sometimes that is
not the same as what the leader wants.
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“We need to find common ground,” she said.
“We agree that the best experience is one in which 4-H members do the
activity. If parents always bail out a kid, they will never learn, or
else have to learn later without a safety net of adult advice.”
Rochelle Weinheimer suggested to the 4-H leaders that they find the
appropriate level of involvement between the members and their parents.
For example, if the kids are planning a trip to the West Edmonton Mall,
they might not realize how expensive it would be. The parents’ proper
role would be to suggest more research rather than tell the kids they
can’t do it.
She and Nielson Griffin said a good idea might be to have parent
meetings to come up with lists of inconvenient meeting dates, ideas for
community service and fundraising, and suggested club topics and
resource people.
Leaders also need to learn how to ask for volunteer help from parents
by appealing to those who have time or expertise. Leaders with large
clubs may rely on parents to serve on committees to help plan
activities.
The major point of 4-H is to have the kids do the thinking and the
work, said the two specialists. Members need time to explore and ramble
with ideas, which means leaders must be prepared to ask parents to go
for coffee to give the kids time to discuss an issue alone. Another
idea is to raise a topic and then table the discussion until the next
meeting when everyone is prepared and has views on the issue.
Parents can offer advice, but only if asked, they suggested. The adults
should only step in if there is a safety problem or if a job is too
large or the member is too inexperienced to handle it.
On a range of adult involvement in youth livestock projects, from no
adult connection to hiring a professional fitter, the best situation is
where adults clip and groom animals for instruction purposes, says a
paper from the provincial 4-H council. For regional shows, adults and
non 4-H members are not allowed to physically prepare or groom project
animals for the show ring.
