Q: I am writing to you about my mom. We have so many shows on television these days about hoarding and all of the problems it causes, I cannot help but wonder if Mom is not a bona fide hoarder.
The other day I confided with my father about my concerns but he rejected them straight out.
He said that Mom is just a collector, that she is not a hoarder and that I do not need to worry about her. But I am concerned and I am not sure what to do about it.
Read Also
Sask. ag group wants strychnine back
The Agricultural Producers Association of Saskatchewan has written to the federal government asking for emergency use of strychnine to control gophers
Do you have any suggestions?
A: You do not want to label your mom as a hoarder unless you have the support of your mental health team confirming your suspicions.
Your dad could be right. Your mom might be a collector, not a hoarder. Both hoarders and collectors tend to accumulate more than they could possibly need.
The difference is that collectors are systematic.
They know what they need and they organize their collections when they pick up new items.
Hoarders are disorganized. They pick up almost anything for almost any reason and often do so spontaneously without thinking about what they are doing.
Whatever it is that the hoarder picks up ends up in a clutter of things strewn about the house.
Hoarders tend to have three characteristics.
They tend to pick up more than they need. It is called excessive accumulation.
The second is that hoarders have trouble getting rid of what they already have. Every piece of junk has some special meaning to hoarders and they simply cannot part with what they have. They cannot sell, give or throw it away.
The third characteristic is that they let their stuff get in the way, creating a cluttered mess in the family living spaces.
If you have reason to believe that your mom is a hoarder, try to encourage her to spend some time with your local mental health team.
Be careful. Not all professionals are familiar with those treatment programs that work successfully with hoarders.
Helping them takes more than medication to resolve their difficulties.
The treatment program is long, intensive and a lot more complicated than what’s depicted on TV.
If your mom is a hoarder, she is among the two to six percent of North Americans who share this behaviour.
If she agrees to work with a mental health team, she can recover from it but it may take up to a year.
