Pot puns need to be nipped in the bud

If you’re curious now that marijuana is legal in Canada, there is no shortage of news articles for your edification.

Several media outlets have had fun with the whole thing, which actually is quite a thing, because a Toronto-Dominion Bank paper says legalized cannabis will add $8 billion annually to the economy.

Noting the marijuana effect, the bank lifted its economic growth for the fourth quarter to 2.9 percent from two percent — that’s higher.

If you’re wondering whether it’s true that cannabis gives you the munchies, the Globe and Mail reports that one experiment “hotboxed” rats — they were placed in a box with marijuana smoke — and then fed chocolate milk. The rats didn’t eat much at first, but then they had a lot of small meals. Still, over four hours they ate about the same as normal.

Toronto Star beauty blogger Michelle Bilodeau says cannabis is better than booze because it doesn’t cause hangovers. Besides, says Bilodeau, marijunana is “a female plant that most women can identify with and that can help us in many ways.”

Didn’t know that.

National Post columnist Randall Denley observed “marijuana legalization is an invitation to be stupid, but we have a right to be stupid.”

Freedom of choice. So it’s a higher calling.

Toronto Sun columnist Simone Paget noted 78 percent of women have used marijuana while having sex, and helpfully adds that an online dating app has many profiles that claim to be “420-friendly.” (This is apparently a code.)

The Western Producer’s Karen Briere kept it real, noting that cannabis growers can apply for federal agricultural funding but can’t access business risk management programs because of the expected highs and lows of the market.

And back to those munchies: the Star interviewed Will Hyde of Leafly Canada, who offered that diners can “infuse steak” with cannabis, as well as the more traditional brownies.

Those of us of a certain vintage will remember Bill “The Spaceman” Lee, the Montreal Expos pitcher who used to sprinkle marijuana on his pancakes.

Hyde also notes that some retailers in Washington state, where marijuana consumption has been legal since 2012, offer a healthy menu consisting of cannabis-infused granola, sports drinks and power bars.

Which would also accommodate the munchies — two birds with one stone, as it were.

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