Q: I know that if I lost quite a few pounds, my self-esteem would skyrocket and I would generally enjoy life more. The problem is that when I start a diet or any kind of weight loss program, I only just get into it before I give up. I suspect that this is true for many people trying to lose weight. What can I do to help me stick to it and get to a more respectable weight?

A: A number of people struggle with diets and many of them will give up before they derive the benefits.

Try switching things around a bit. Instead of dieting to put life into your self-esteem, why don’t you work first on your self-esteem and let the dieting go until you are comfortable with who you are now?

Self-esteem is not necessarily built on attractive physiques. It is not that placid or inactive. In fact, it’s just the reverse.

For most of us, self-esteem often comes from contributing to the well-being of the community. It is not a packaged object kept stored away in the medicine cabinet.

Self-esteem is a process. It comes from being busy doing what you’re capable of doing while working to get to an even better place.

If I play a musical instrument, I need to play it even better. If I draw great pictures, I need to draw magnificent ones and if I am a social animal, I want to be even more skilled relating to friends and peers.

Self-esteem soars when you are able to look at something you are good at doing and know that you are getting even better at doing it.

Once your self-esteem is intact, you are more likely to succeed when you engage in a weight loss program.

Dieting is hard work. You have to commit to some kind of regulated program governing what you can enjoy and add more exercise.

The setbacks are many and at times the progress made is negligible. Getting through those tough times is not always easy. But it is more likely if your self-esteem is there to carry you through.

You might find that once you get your self-esteem back on track, dieting or any kind of weight loss will not be an issue.