If it walks like a duck

If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, as the saying goes, then it probably is a duck. But recent events show that isn’t necessarily true.
Via an insatiable hunger for news stories about farm animals, the Aflac duck has come within our radar range.

Auditions were underway this week to find the new voice of the Aflac duck, that irascible and oddly endearing bird that shills for the Aflac insurance company. According to all reports, people were walking like ducks and quacking like ducks in efforts to gain the role, which, according to the New York Times, comes with a six-figure salary.
More than $100,000 for quacking like a duck? Sign me up!
There is no shortage of people thinking the same thing. Some are auditioning live in one of six American cities, and some are auditioning on-line. While it would be fun to audition, it’s probably far less enjoyable to have to listen to 11,000 people quacking like ducks. Then again, maybe those people are getting six-figure salaries as well.

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A replacement for the voice we know from Aflac television ads is necessary because the former voice, Gilbert Gottfried, was fired after making jokes about the Japanese earthquake and tsunami. Insurance company executives were not amused even after Gottfried apologized.
So, to qualify, it’s not necessary for you to walk like a duck. But if you can quack like a duck, specifically the Aflac duck, you might want to send an audition. Quack! Aflac!