You hear the question on radio call-in shows every time the government
considers a new agricultural program: If farmers need money so badly,
why do they have those big fancy pickup trucks?
The question makes the blood boil, with its implication that farmers
are profligate spenders who inexplicably insist on asking for
government programs that support farm profitability. So, we’ve prepared
a sample response.
Dear People with Pickup Envy: As a farmer, I’d like to be able to tell
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you I need a new pickup truck to haul around all the money I make from
farming. I’d like to say I need the pulling power so I can take all the
empty champagne bottles to the depot after the neighbours and I
celebrate a bountiful harvest.
I’d like to be able to say I need a new pickup because the ashtrays
were full on the old one and that I need a unit with more cup holders.
I’d even like to be able to tell you I need a new truck because the dog
deserved something nicer to ride in, and that I need the cargo space to
haul in the gopher tails I amassed in the great gopher derby.
But the truth of the matter is, I live 30 kilometres from the nearest
town and 75 km from the nearest hospital, so a reliable vehicle that
can haul cargo, pull a trailer and get through mud and snow seems like
a pretty good idea. The diesel saves money on fuel.
At one time I thought a nice new truck would encourage my son to stay
on the farm. That didn’t work, so now we use it to visit him at his job
and home in the city.
Before I had my truck, I tried to haul my bull to auction in my wife’s
minivan, but he made a mess of the upholstery. Tried to sell it, but
there were no takers, so she still uses it to commute to her job in
town. That helps keep the farm afloat.
The bank and the government and the public kept telling me to get big
or get out of farming. Said I needed a bigger, more diversified
operation to achieve “economy of scale.”
It made sense, so I bought the big tractor and modern equipment to work
my expanded acreage. Now they tell me I wouldn’t be in financial
difficulty if I hadn’t diversified or expanded.
I’ve come to the conclusion that there are only two professions where
people are expected to work with 30-year-old equipment – farming and
the Canadian military. In both cases, few come to the defence of those
dealing with it.
So yes, I have a pickup truck.
