THE FRINGE

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Electronic pension

Finland and Namibia, says the magazine The Economist, are pioneering a technique of pension delivery that will sweep the world. You collect by inserting a government-issued card into an automatic teller machine.

Presumably when we install the system someone on our government payroll will program into it the levels of clawback we enjoy today. After all, we pensioners would feel left out if we couldn’t help reduce government deficits.

Britain plans to distribute most of its $200 billion in social spending electronically by the year 2000.

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Texas has a program that shows the sweeping power such a system imparts. When Texans in need of food stamps buy groceries, their “Lone Star Card” is slid through a slot. Purchase of liquor or cigarettes on the card is not allowed and the cash register will reject an order including these items.

Since electronics are the wave of the future, a couple of years ago I acquired a bank card and PIN number. I found withdrawing cash in this fashion is handy but not speedy. First you insert your card upside down and right end first or the machine will kick it out. Then you must correctly dial in the PIN. Then push the OK button. Then push the button that says you want to withdraw cash. Then you push the button that says which account you would like to drain today. Then you dial in how much money you are withdrawing, complete with decimal point.

If you have been meticulously correct in all that the machine tells you to pull out your card in order to receive cash.

Isn’t it great to know you are part of the march of progress?