Please pardon the hang-ups.
And the miscalculated taxes.
Really, we didn’t intend to be impolite on the phone, nor did we wish to be misers and save a few pennies at the risk of driving other companies crazy with improper balances.
Our office has been helplessly held hostage by failing technology.
In recent weeks there has been abrupt loss of telephone connections in the middle of calls. It appears our bills have been paid, but some mysterious technological bug has struck our lifeline to the outside world. Various departments have occasionally been hit.
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It is suspected the problem may be originating from our main circuit board. But until it is solved in the near future there may be a few more irate customers finding themselves suddenly talking to static. It may especially hit on our busiest days. We apologize for the problem and appreciate your patience in phoning back.
Another mysterious problem arose recently when our librarian received a letter asking for us to remit an extra 45 cents of GST she had neglected to mail with a subscription. Puzzled, she drew out her calculator and multiplied the price by the seven percent tax. Her calculator still stuck stubbornly to the original number.
She approached another calculator and inputted the numbers – and voila! the extra 45 cents appeared.
It appears her faithful numeric companion is no longer faithful. A few more multiplications revealed it sometimes spewed forth “zero” for no logical reason other that to irritate its owner, and anyone attempting to collect GST.
Perhaps it has an aversion to percentages. Or to taxes.
We apologize for any subscriptions done recently that may be out by a few cents. However, before mailing us a new invoice, consider that the price of the stamp and stationery to inform us of the mistake may cost more than the original tax missing.
