Colleen Gwilliam, who farms with her husband, Sam, near Kelvington, Sask., summarizes the past crop year.
On the first month of this year, my true love said to me , “It’s gonna be a good year.”
On the second month of this year, my true love said to me, “Double check the seeding plans cause you know it’s gonna be a good year.”
On the third month of this year, my true love said to me, “Happy birthday, you’re looking good. Double check the seeding plans ‘cause you know it’s gonna be a good year.”
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On the fourth month of this year, my true love said to me “Snow’s going. Still looking good. Seed, fertilizer ready ’cause you know it’s gonna be a good year.”
On the fifth month of this year, my true love said to me, “Little on the wet side. Thought it would be early. Move a little faster. Change of plans. Hope we can get a good year.”
On the sixth month of this year, my true love said to me, “Get the big towrope. When will it stop raining? Move a lot faster. Another change of plans and hope we can get a good year.”
On the seventh month of this year, my true love said to me, “Help fix the cultivator. Buy a new towrope. Should we build an ark? Are you really stuck in the mud? Can’t you get here sooner? New plan of attack just to get through this year.”
On the eight month of this year, my true love said to me, “Please pray for hail. Help fix the cultivator. Where’d we leave the towrope? Never saw it this wet. How did you get stuck there? Starting to show your age. Change of plans again just to get through this year.”
On the ninth month of this year, my husband said to me, “I’m too old for this crap. Still a chance for hail. We need a new cultivator. Someone stole the towrope. Will it ever dry up? I’ll pull you out in a minute. You’re younger than me. Whatever it takes just to get through this year.”
On the 10th month of this year, that guy said to me, “Let’s try to fix this mess. We’re too old for this crap. Maybe if it doesn’t rain anymore. Cultivators could fall apart any minute. Help load the new towrope. Getting a bit drier. I’ll be there in a minute. I’m sick of this too! Hope to fix this mess before there’s an end to this year.”
On the 11th month of this year, that man said to me, “Just dress for 40 below. Keep trying to fix this mess. We’re too old for this @#@$@. Hope for not much snow. I can still ditch. Do you know where the towrope is? Get the bags picked up. I’d like to run over my cell phone. Be there when I get there. Hope there’s soon an end to this year.”
On the 12th month of this year, my true love said to me “Fertilizer and seed ordered. Doesn’t seem that cold anymore. Hope no skidooer hits the v-ditch. Ya, I’ll help pull the grader out. Grain bags done finally. Be nice to get a chance to finally relax. Thank God I traded off that cultivator. Let’s have a drink and a toast. Here’s hoping we can forget about that year.”
