We tend to have a number of expectations built into Christmas, and each carries within it the seeds of disappointment.
Fortunately for most of us, the few disappointments that come to bear are overwhelmed by the spirit of good fellowship. Nonetheless, preparing ourselves emotionally for the season is something of a priority.
We do not have a perfect formula to follow as we prepare for Christmas but we can pay attention to a number of suggestions.
They are just reminders from the oft too-forgotten world of good intentions.
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The first suggestion is to try to get some rest. Christmas celebrations abound during the month of December. There are Christmas parties, shopping, decorating the tree, unexpected visitors, more invitations, fundraising and special services at church. As delightful as the celebrations are, they tend to wear a person down. A few timeouts or afternoon naps are always helpful. Those who are rested will most likely enjoy the day more.
Fresh air and exercise are always important. Who can resist those trays of extra snacks, the temptation of shortbread with fruitcake and mincemeat tarts? A few extra pounds is almost a given during the season. Most of us have intricate digestive systems to accommodate the additional calories. But our systems need some help, and the more we can get out for a little fresh air with a few jaunts of physical exercise, the less likely we are to regret reading the bathroom scales after the Christmas tree has long since bade farewell to the living room. We do not need more reasons to regret what might have been.
Finally, a touch of realism is important. Just as the child has to limit the size of his Christmas wish list to fit Mom and Dad’s personal budgets, so do we have to narrow our hopes of what is possible. Not everyone can get home for Christmas. Not all of us can get enough time off from other responsibilities to go where we would like for a holiday.
Sometimes family tensions and anxieties will continue throughout the day, despite our best efforts to avoid them. If we pretend that they will not surface during the day, we will likely be disappointed when they do.
The point is that disappointment can be self-generated. The more realistic we can keep our expectations for Christmas, the less likely we are to be disappointed.
Christmas, without its tinsel and ribbons, is just another day. The more rested, healthy and sensible we are, the more likely we are to enjoy it. Then maybe, it will become something special.
Jacklin Andrews is a family counsellor, living and working in west-central Saskatchewan who has taught social work for two universities. Mail correspondence in care of Western Producer, Box 2500, Saskatoon, Sask., S7K 2C4 or e-mail jandrews@producer.com.
