Q: I am proud that our two teenaged boys make a point of spending extra time with their grandfather. I know that their visits are special for him, but I also know they would like to be doing more for Grandpa. They are looking to me for guidance. What do you suggest?
A: Your question is relevant for many families.
The first task for your sons is to listen to their aging grandfather. Most old guys have their stories that they love to tell young people and they love to tell their stories more than once.
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Listening is an art and a science. The more your sons can develop that skill with their grandfather, the more likely they will be able to use it to build successful relationships.
Your sons can keep going for walks with him, take in a game at the hockey arena or curling rink, go fishing or whatever Grandpa likes to do.
As Grandpa ages, the list of what he is able to do gets shorter. The danger is that he will begin to believe that he is not able to do anything.
It is important for him physically and psychologically, to have some sense of control over his life. He is more likely to have that sense of self-control if he is as active as he can be.
The sad truth is that only about one in five seniors are as physically active. Many seniors get discouraged. The rewards for robust activities are not always immediately apparent. But the personal rewards for Grandpa going for a walk is s spending time with your sons.
Of course, once it starts it continues elsewhere. Chances are good that your sons will find Grandpa busy doing other things once they get him up and about. That is what could be rewarding for your sons.
