Q: My girlfriend and I have been hanging around each other for more than two and a half years. We are hoping that we will be married by this time next year.
Despite that, I am continually frustrated by her.
My girlfriend’s first husband was unfaithful most of the time, which hurt and scared her. Despite what I say or do, she has trouble trusting me. How can I let my girlfriend know that I love her in such a way that she can start to believe and have faith in me?
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A: “How do I love thee, let me count the ways” are among the most popular words ever written in love poems.
It dates back to those glorious knights in shining armour, thundering through the courtyards on their horses, lances drawn to challenge each other and prove themselves worthy of the little hankies dropped by their fair maidens.
Troubadours played their lutes and brought flowers to their ladies fair, while poets crafted their syntax to bring word power into their most intimate relationships.
They were searching for that magical mystery to court the perfect love.
You are not the only one trying to prove your love. It is so simple: the mystery of love is in the heart.
This is not, of course, the heart studied and nurtured by cardiologists. They could study the most intricate cardiovascular system ad infinitum and still go home to an empty apartment after work.
Neither am I referring to that sexual being, or heart, which haunts the pages of dollar store romance novels.
I am referring to the word “heart,” in which the middle word is “ear,” which gives you the opportunity to listen to your partner.
The ear is the key to relationship problems. The more that you use your ears and listen to your girlfriend, the greater the odds that she will strengthen trust sin you.
Of course, to listen more effectively, you have to start by looking after yourself. The healthier and happier you are within yourself, the more comfort you will bring into your relationship and the better you will hear whatever it is she is trying to tell you.
