Q:Ever since we brought our newborn daughter home from the hospital, our four-and-a-half-year-old son has been acting up.
My husband and I knew that he would have to adjust to the baby but we never expected this. He has regressed. He is incontinent and the other day I caught him feeding himself from the baby’s bottle. His jealousy scares me. What can I do to help our son?
A:Jealousy is normal when a new baby is introduced to the family. Much attention is now directed toward the new baby that once was directed at the older sibling.
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The problem now is how you handle his jealousy, envy and regression to infantile behaviour.
Don’t overreact. Kids are creative. If they cannot get your attention in normal ways, they will resort to something that is either naughty or disturbing.
Parental overreaction may well reinforce the negative behaviour because it comes with the attention the jealous child is craving.
Pay extra attention to your older son. Although he may not require as much care as the infant, he has needs.
The more you are able to listen to him, the more successful you will be. Start to work on the relationship between the two children even at this early age.
He is too young to leave alone with the baby but he can learn from his parents how to be sensitive to his baby sister.
Caring for your newborn baby while listening and supporting your older son and teaching him how to properly interact with his younger sister is demanding.
Hopefully you and your husband are working as a team to handle the many demands of child rearing.
Parenting is hard work but when you see your children safely sleeping at night, it’s worth the effort.
Jacklin Andrews is a family counsellor from Saskatchewan. Contact:
