Q: I have tried to give up smoking and drinking several times over the last few years. I realize both are not good for my health, but they are like weeds in my life that I can’t get rid of.
A: We never get rid of bad habits. We just get them under control. The key to living a clean life is a bit like having a clean garden. You continually have to weed out bad habits and replace them with good ones. Here are some ideas.
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Keep a daily logbook and draw a line down the middle. Think of good things you do for yourself and write them on one side each time you do it. Pat yourself on the back when you do something good.
When you do something not so good, recognize it right away. Then put yourself in a position where you won’t be tempted to repeat that habit, at least not right away.
If you had a cigarette, you can put the package somewhere that you can’t get at easily, such as locking it in the trunk of your car. This won’t stop you from smoking again, but it will delay you.
If you give in and have another cigarette or beer, first write down on the other side of the logbook how long you have gone without it. If you have another cigarette, then get the cigarettes away from you or get yourself away from the beer.
Next, before you have another cigarette or beer, agree that you have to stop and have a 10 minute discussion with yourself asking the reasons why. You need to figure out the emotional or social reasons you have that cigarette or beer.
Some reasons are not logical. Nicotine does not calm a person down. It increases their metabolism and winds them up. A beer does not make a person feel more confident. They just ignore their social impact.
At the end of your discussion, write down the positive and negative reasons for having that cigarette or beer. You may still decide to have it, but this exercise will help reduce the impulsive nature of your behaviour.
By going through this exercise after every cigarette or beer, not in a punishing way, but in an exploratory way, you will understand why you behave the way you do.
By getting down to the root of the issue, you will have better luck in the future.
Peter Griffiths is a mental health counsellor based in Prince Albert, Sask. His columns are intended as general advice only. His website is www.sasktelwebsite.net/petecope.
