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THE FRINGE

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Published: September 2, 1999

Pinto Thompson will be a tough act to follow

Passenger train conductors were people of consequence in their day.

I remember Pinto Thompson, who used to embarrass me when I was a young sprout.

Pinto was on the Canadian Pacific run between Winnipeg and Edmonton.

There was a morning train running west and an evening train running east, carrying passengers, mail, cream cans, freight, baby chicks, groceries, dogs, cats, flowers, you name it.

Pinto’s job was to oversee the passengers, to collect tickets and to make sure young children left in his care were directed off at the right destination.

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He even delivered a baby for a woman from my home town.

At each stop he would determine if all the off-loading and on-loading was complete.

Then he would signal to the engineer to go and shout:

“Board!”

If I was wearing a cap I could count on Pinto pulling it down over my nose. Invariably his first question to any boy under 10 would be:

“Well, young fellow, are you married yet?”

Railway conductors had an aura about them.

You kidded with them but you knew this impressive person in the navy suit and peaked cap could order you off the train if you didn’t have a ticket or the funds for one.

His arrival brought on a panic attack until the ticket was found in the last place you looked – in your shirt pocket.

We’re taking a train trip this summer and if the conductor asks if I’m married yet, I won’t have to squirm in embarrassment. I’ll bravely look him in the eye and answer:

“Yes I am, and here she is.”

And I’ll look him up and down and compare him with Pinto Thompson.

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