Q: I want my child to do her best at school. I regularly consult with her teacher. But my daughter, who is in junior high, either insists she doesn’t have any assignments when she sometime does, or puts off doing them to the last minute and then does a poor job. Her teacher tells me she can do better. What can I do?
A: Most parents want to help their children. But a survey showed that half of parents spent less than 10 minutes a day helping children with homework.
Read Also
Communication key to bridging generation gap
Each generation is shaped by the predominant forces at play during their formative years. Acknowledging these influences can improve communication among the generations.
Homework time needs to be a regularly scheduled routine. Turn off distractions such as televisions or radios. See that other children do not interfere. Earphones or headsets for CD players or televisions may help with this. Set up a place to work that is comfortable but clutter-free.
Make your time free when she is doing homework. You don’t need to look over her shoulder, but you need to help her get organized.
Be available in the area. Stop by now and then to see how she is doing. You don’t need all the answers yourself. You are only her coach and resource person. Don’t do the work for her. Instead, guide her so she can learn to work more independently. Encourage her when she is struggling with a tough problem to explore various resources.
Schedule breaks from studying, perhaps with snacks, and a bit of exercise to help keep stress and tension low.
Talk with her teachers about the assignments, especially ones she finds difficult. If you understand them, you will be better able to guide your daughter to understand it as well. Many schools have information on homework assignments or guides on studying.
When I was in Grade 8, I was failing miserably with algebra. Instead of using theory to solve problems, I tried to do them by hit and miss trial attempts.
One evening my father saw how frustrated I was getting. He walked me through the proper way of approaching an algebra problem. I soon picked it up and was able to do the rest on my own.
English assignments are difficult for some children. They may not know how to start. Also, their first draft often rambles on and doesn’t focus on the points they want to make.
Try these ideas. If she can’t get started, have her brainstorm opening lines for the essay, including funny ones. This will help her to relax and think more easily.
Helpful methods
Offer to read your daughter’s written assignment aloud to her. Read it slowly. She will be able to react to it more objectively and see room for improvement. You might even help her write one sentence in different ways and verb styles to see which presents her idea clearest.
As a writer myself, I am thankful for editors, who helped me become a better writer. Every time I look at one of their edits, I learn something new. I then try to incorporate that idea in my future writing. I also leave what I have written for 24 hours before I edit it myself. This allows me to treat my work more objectively.
Getting a teenager to complete assignments at least 24 hours before they are due may be difficult at first. But when they have a chance to review it before they turn it in, they often see ways to improve it and
are also likely to get a better grade. And with computers, changes are easy to make.
Peter Griffiths is a mental health counsellor based in Prince Albert, Sask. His columns are intended as general advice only. His website is www.sasktelwebsite.net/petecope.
